Child's Play
by NaomiTheGLaD
Summary: GLaDOS has managed to scrape together some new test subjects as humanity begins its comeback. Wheatley is brought back from space to watch them. Although, it seems GLaDOS would rather test him. Eventual WheatDOS. Androids. Rated T for language.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** Weeeeellllll I have a new obsession. I couldn't think of a title for this and then I was listening to my iPod and this Hatsune Miku song(Electric Angel) came on and I'm like "You know why the hell not?" Whenever I listen to that song I have a weird mental image of GLaDOS flying around while Wheatley and Chell stare on in confusion. Then I wrote the chapter and I'm like "Y'know this fits more." I wasn't sure if I should write this in the first place as I'm not too familiar with Half Life (literally everything I know of Half Life comes from that one Fanfic "Half Life: Full Life Consequences" JOHN FREEMAN WHO WAS GORDAN FREEMAN'S BROTHER WAS ONE DAY AN OFFICE, TYPING ON A COMPUTER! Oh and Ten FTW) and since Portal and Half Life share a timeline… But I'm going to write it anyways so it's nut my fault if Dumblydore swers ok! Lollollol but seriously. To avoid that I'm setting this pretty far after Portal 2. TEH HUMENS R REPOPULATIN!1111oneone!

BEWARE: There be WheatDOS ahead! Also, GLaDOS and the cores are androids in this.

Also, I'm sorry for this long-ass author's note.

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><p><strong>Android Hell<strong>

**Chapter One**

Wheatley stared up at the blurry shape above him. He couldn't see anything. His glasses floated away sometime in his punishment. How long had it been since he felt gravity? He wanted to throw himself on the ground and kiss it. But he wouldn't. Maybe later. Even without his glasses, he knew where he was and who he was in front of.

"Honestly, it escapes me why they programmed your eyes to be so messed-up." Her voice sounded. A claw deposited the wire frames in front of him. Wheatley then wanted to throw himself at the feet of the woman, thanking her over and over. But he didn't.

"How did you find them?" he squeaked, mentally slapping himself for doing so. He sounded so…scared. But he was. Terrified actually.

"They were stuck on an old satellite." Wheatley pushed the glasses on his nose, suddenly disoriented at the clearness of everything. After his dizzy spell, his fears were confirmed.

Staring back down at him was GLaDOS, with a look on her face that was literally _unreadable. _Disdain mixed with boredom. But there was something else… Glee? What could GLaDOS be so happy about? Whatever mix of emotion showed in her yellow eyes, it was menacing. GLaDOS' death glare could cause even the strongest of men to break down into a crying blob of flesh. And Wheatley was far from the strongest of men.

She wore a pristine lab coat over a black dress. Plain, practical clothing. Dozens of wires jutted from her back. She sat from an almost invisible chair that floated in the air. She could just hang from her wires, like a puppet, but that got uncomfortable after a while, Wheatley knew from experience.

"Wanna go back to space… Miss space… Need to go back to space…" the Space Core rocked back and forth mumbling incoherently. GLaDOS sighed and a claw grabbed him by the leg and carried him off.

"Hey! You aren't going to incinerate him, right?" Wheatley yelled.

"No. Why do you care, moron?" she hissed.

"I dunno… He's a bit unstable but not a bad guy." He looked down at his feet. "Anyway, why'd you bring us down?"

"Since you were in space, humans have begun to repopulate. Somehow a few have stumbled upon the Enrichment Center. It's fortunate really. I was becoming bored with no perishable test subjects." GLaDOS began to explain, a sadistic edge in her voice. "I've been able to find a few more humans to test upon. I prefer to test one at a time, as you know. So, I need you to take care of the test subjects in suspension."

"Can't you just find someone else?" Wheatley asked.

"I could, but you've done it before so why bother teaching someone else when I could just fetch you?" she asked. Then she jumped down from her chair, somehow disconnected herself from her wires and walked up to Wheatley. She leaned close to his ear and whispered, "I am also going to make your life a living hell."

Wheatley gulped.

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><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> OKAY THAT WAS PRETTY SHORT! And it sucked *sad face* Hopefully as I continue it will get better. Please review! I will GLaDley accept any criticism! LOL! I didn't make pun up…


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Well, this story has undergone a name change and so have I! I'm truly sorry I didn't update for like ever. I was distracted with school, Portal, my vacation to the Outer Banks, and more school. I hope you can find it in your hearts to forgive me. So, here's chapter two. I hope you enjoy!**

**BEWARE: Androids, ho!**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Portal. I'm not _that _awesome.**

**Child's Play**

**Chapter Two**

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><p>GLaDOS tapped her fingers on her thigh as she watched a test subject navigate Test Chamber… Nine? She glanced at the entrance to the test. Yes. Test Chamber Nine. A prerecorded message played as he reached the end of the test.<p>

"Very good [test subject name here]! You have just helped science advance by fifty years!" GLaDOS' recorded voice rang out. She frowned at the sound of her voice. It was too happy. She hated giving out praise to the humans, even though it was necessary for them to keep testing.

GLaDOS sighed. She remembered finding that vault with all the humans kept in cryogenic storage. She remembered how thrilled she had been at that point. What she hadn't taken into account was how long the humans had been in storage. A few of them were dead, somehow. Some were brain damaged beyond the point from which GLaDOS would have something to work with. She thought nothing of it, as she had many more test subjects. But they died one by one. Drowning. Getting hit in the head with cubes. Turrets. Falling out of beams. Lasers. She even had to use neurotoxin on one subject who somehow escaped from a test chamber. Luckily, GLaDOS had caught it early. A lot more of the test subjects died because GLaDOS was not paying attention.

And that's why she brought the moron back to Earth. Now, she was aware that Wheatley's incompetence could have very well killed most of the test subjects she had in the long-term relaxation vaults. But, she had been sure to make it _crystal_ clear that if he let one single test subject die, she would not hesitate to end his life. Painfully. Okay, maybe not one test subject. That seemed a little bit like overkill to GLaDOS, as humans were so fragile even if you paid absolute attention to them, they could just die. _But __why __should __I __show __him __any __mercy_, GLaDOS thought. As much as she wanted to, she could not forget what he had done to the facility. She wouldn't let herself forget. He would suffer. The room with the screaming robots seemed like a good idea, but no. Just no. Physical pain and mental pain were two different things. And mental pain was almost always at least fifty times as strong.

GLaDOS' thoughts turned to one of her favorite tests, the companion cube test. It was fun to give someone something to care for, watch them become attached, and then tear it away from them. The reaction to "Unfortunately, it must be euthanized." was always a blast to watch. Most looked up in disbelief, some broke down into tears. Once she had a test subject jump into the incinerator with the cube. It annoyed and entertained GLaDOS at the same time. She smiled at the memory. Then of course the mute lunatic just chucked it into the incinerator without a second thought. GLaDOS' smile disappeared.

As her test subject began the next test, she continued her thoughts on Wheatley's torture. _Mental __trauma__… __Mental __trauma__… _GLaDOS then remembered the look of pure terror he gave her when he was pulled back down from space. Her smile reappeared and she couldn't resist letting a chuckle loose. That was great. Maybe when he finished his rounds to the test subjects she'd have him just sit in her chamber. They could have a staring contest. She liked that idea.

A voice at the back of her mind yelled, "Hey, why not just force him to perform manual labor instead of disrupting his psyche?"

Caroline. GLaDOS recalled the relief she felt when Caroline was deleted. She would never have to feel human emotions again. Then GLaDOS realized a complication. Her love for science, which was partly programmed into her brain, came mostly from Caroline. If the secretary remained deleted as GLaDOS would have liked, there was a good chance she would succumb to what the moron called "The Itch". _It __is __a __good __name __for __it __really._ GLaDOS grimaced at the thought of acknowledging that Wheatley had a good idea. It was very fortunate that GLaDOS figured it out and was able to reinstall Caroline.

Manual labor… That _was_ a good idea. But he was sort of already doing that. And GLaDOS wanted it to hurt. Oh she wanted it to hurt. He would beg for death when she was done. But how to have it begin? The staring contest sounded okay, but she'd have to combine it with something more traumatizing. It would have to be slow too. A process.

Then a loud beeping jerked GLaDOS from her brainstorming. She turned to the monitor monitoring the entrance to Aperture. A woman and a young girl opened the shed door.

"Momma, where are we?" the little girl asked, removing her thumb from her mouth.

"It's okay, Emma. We're just going to hide in here for a while." The mother said stroking Emma's auburn hair. She guided the child inside. GLaDOS couldn't believe her luck. Two test subjects, just stumbling right into her grasp. Given the little girl would have to be kept in stasis for a bit. Still. GLaDOS waited for the right moment. When it arrived, she locked the shed door, lifted an elevator, pushing the pair out of the way in the process. The mother started to try to break the steal door. The little girl just sucked her thumb and looked up at the camera with big scared brown eyes. GLaDOS took a picture of the little girl's face. It reminded her of Bring Your Daughter to Work Day. Then she dragged the mother and daughter into the elevator, shut the door and started its descent into Aperture. GLaDOS turned her attention to the stasis pod she just assigned to the girl.

The elevator reached its destination. She pulled the little girl out and swiftly closed the door so the mother could not grab her. The mother banged, clawed, and screamed at the door. GLaDOS then had the elevator leave, just as the mother broke into tears. Emma just gazed thoughtfully at the departing elevator, "Momma?" she asked.

_"__You __monster.__"_ Caroline hissed. GLaDOS laughed.

"Hey, moron!" she called.

"Huh? And I'm not a-" Wheatley looked up towards the nearest camera.

"Finish that sentence and it's all over." GLaDOS threatened.

Wheatley gulped, "Yes?"

"I have a new arrival for you."

"Right… I'll take care of it. No need to worry, love. It's done as long as you want it done."

"A simple 'I'm on it' would suffice. And what did you just call me?" she spat.

"Lo- Um… N-nothing, m'am."

"Good, hurry up. And when you're done, come to my chamber."

The moron's blue eyes displayed a look of absolute terror. GLaDOS tried not to laugh.

"W-why?"

"Don't ask questions! Just get over here!" she snapped.

"Right away, lo- I mean m'am! Yes, m'am! I was going to say that all along, you know?"

"I don't care. Just hurry." She decided to end communications then.

Turning her attention back to the test subject she left alone at chamber ten, she noticed he was at the companion cube test. Then an idea began to form in GLaDOS' mind. She looked at the girl in the stasis pod, Emma.

"Tear it away…"

GLaDOS muted Caroline's outbursts, cementing the inhumanity of her plan. It was inhumane for the girl, the girl's mother, and, if everything worked correctly, for Wheatley.

But GLaDOS was not human. Not in the slightest.

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><p><strong>AN: BWAHAHAHAHAHA! *cough* So yep. I will try to update more regularly but I warn you I get easily distract- OOH! THAT THING HAS NUMBERS ON IT!1111oneoneone**

**Please review. I need to know what you think. I NEED TO KNOW! *insert overkill here***


	3. Chapter 3

**Child's Play**

**BEWARE: Androids, ho!**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Portal. **

**Chapter Three**

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><p>Wheatley sped along the maintenance rail, attached to it by a retractable wire coming from his mid-back. <em>She<em> wanted him in her chamber. What could _she _possibly want? Wheatley could only imagine that _she _was going to kill him. His mind panicked and he almost disengaged from his rail. He shrieked as he realized that he was gliding over a pit.

"Okay. Alright. Okay. It's okay." He panted in terror. "She can't kill you yet. She said it herself. She needs you to help… Okay. Keep going, Wheatley…" He continued down the rail.

…

Even after all the self-reassuring in the world, Wheatley hid behind the wall before the entrance to GLaDOS' chamber. "I can't do this." He mumbled to himself over and over again.

"I know you're there!" GLaDOS yelled. Wheatley looked into the emancipation grill separating him from her. Her eyes were fixed on him, and her arms were folded. He shuffled inside. Her eyes flicked from him to the chair, silently commanding him to sit. So he did. And he sat for a while. And she just stared at him. And that was it.

Wheatley wasn't sure to be relieved or unnerved. Part of him screamed, "Hey, she's not killing you! That's great!" Another, more dominant part of him felt extreme terror at her stare. Yellow, a color commonly associated with the sun, seemed colder than dry ice. Wheatley wanted more than anything to rip his eyes from hers, but like flesh on dry ice, his gaze was stuck. Her lips twitched, almost, _almost_, forming a smirk.

"That's enough of that. For now…" she finally spoke.

"Why am I here?"

"I have a new job for you."

"W-well, what is it?"

"I found a woman and child near the entrance to the facility. You placed the woman in the Aperture Science Long-Term Relaxation Center. The child I was hoping to keep in stasis until she would be of the proper age for testing. Then I realized," her voice gained a small yet noticeable amount of sadness, "that the girl's age is about three years old. It's not safe, developmentally for me to keep her in stasis. Her mind wouldn't grow at the same rate as her body."

"So… Brain damage?"

"Developmental problems. Essentially, yes."

"Then how did you keep the other test subjects in stasis without brain damage?" he asked.

"Who said I didn't? I had a problem with it here and there. But the girls I had in stasis were at the youngest seven. At that time, motor skills are usually developed so usually it is safer. Do you understand?"

"Yeah… So what do you want me to do?"

GLaDOS stopped trying to conceal her grin. "Take care of her." Before Wheatley could say anything she continued, "This is not a choice."

Wheatley opened his mouth and made a strange choking noise that he had intended to be a question.

"And what if you don't, you were going to ask? You die. Plain and simple. I like it when I don't have to pretend I'm not going to kill someone. If the girl dies as a result of your neglect, you will die. Understand?"

"Umm… N-not really. Why w-would you need m-me to do that?"

"No comment."

"H-how am I supposed to take care of a three-year-old human? I'm an a-android. Where am I supposed to get food? Humans need food. Where is she going to sleep? If you're worried about development, I for one think this is a _really _bad idea."

"Well, for food I think you're set. There are potatoes growing all over this building. In places where I am not able to reach fully. Those plants are smarter than you. Although that doesn't surprise me. I had the misfortune of being a potato for a while, thanks to someone we all know and love." Wheatley shrunk a bit under her gaze.

"Uh, if it means anything now, I'm sorry for that."

"Oh. It doesn't mean anything. I'm still going to get revenge."

"That's what this is for right? Revenge?"

GLaDOS' eyebrows rose. "How observant you are, Wheatley!" That was the first time he ever heard her using his name.

"That reminds me. Do you know where she is? That test subject. You know the one that you pulled back inside."

"Oh. Chell?"

"Chell? Was that her name? Interesting. Must be short for something. Maybe Michelle or Rachel."

GLaDOS took his remark as a yes. "Just Chell. Yes I do know where she is. She's at the surface, causing more trouble up there. Although, you've been in space for an awfully long amount of time so there is a fairly large chance she's dead. Why?"

Wheatley looked crestfallen, "It's just that I kinda wanted to apologize to her… For what I've done. It was awful of me to send you both down there. Putting you into a potato was uncalled for and then I almost killed you two on a number of occasions."

"_And _you pretty much destroyed my facility. Don't forget the nuclear explosion you almost caused. You remember, the one that would've killed us and a lot of people on the surface, not that I care about them? It's not like you needed to smash atoms together to destroy things. You did a hell of a number on this place. It took me quite a long time to fix it. It wasn't completely cleaned up from my absence anyways. And then whilst in the underground levels of the facility, I was able, well forced really, to dig through my files so I could piece together my back-story. That was _very _painful, by the way. Then I got to see my facility, my pride and joy, falling apart just because my murderer and one idiot who came along for the ride decided they wanted out. You could have just asked." GLaDOS' tone never changed. Her voice was angry and teasing yet steady.

Wheatley scoffed at her last statement. "'You could have just asked.' She says."

She lunged forward, pulling the wires in her chassis with her. Wheatley ran and hid behind his chair. She chuckled.

"Any more questions or comments?"

"No, m'am."

"Good. Very good. The child is waiting in wing G, test chamber 0. Get there."

"Yes, m'am." When he was out of her chamber, he panicked.

"Get there!" she repeated. So he ran.

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><p><strong>Author<strong>**'****s****Note: **Yup. Tell me if that's the worst plotline you've ever heard of. LOL! Imma write this anyway. I hoped you liked this and will bear with me for the rest. Oh, and happy holidays!

Please review! I need to know what you think!


	4. Chapter 4

Child's Play

BEWARE: Androids, ho!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Portal.

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><p><strong>Chapter Four<strong>

When she was absolutely sure he was out of earshot, GLaDOS began to laugh. Actually, it was more of a cackle. She laughed so hard, she doubled over, ripping a few wires from her back.

She sighed, "Great. Just great." She reached around to find the dislodged wires, and plugged them back in. She stretched and searched her monitors for wing G test chamber 0, and got an idea. She found it and zeroed in on it. The little girl sat on a chair, looking at the clipboard, and swinging her legs.

GLaDOS cleared her throat, and spoke into her microphone, "Hello!" the little girl looked up and around for the voice. "Welcome to the Aperture Science Enrichment Center. You are being asked to move to the next test chamber for reasons to be clarified at a later time. Please step through the portal that should appear momentarily on the wall, then proceed through the chamber lock, and await further instructions." The girl's eyebrow's furrowed in thought. GLaDOS snapped her fingers and the portal opened. The little girl she walked over to it and timidly looked through it.

"Like this?" she asked, stepping through the portal.

"Yes. Just like that. Keep going. Towards the door." The girl shuffled over to it, looked back, and stepped in. GLaDOS shut the door behind her, causing her to jump. "Please await further instructions." The little girl looked back at the door, and then plopped down on the floor.

"Now we wait." She told herself, inwardly snickering. Caroline piped up, _This is really childish. Moving the kid to worry him? Are you really stooping this low?_

"Yes. Yes I am." She responded, aloud.

Caroline sighed in resignation, and GLaDOS smiled to herself.

Soon enough, the moron entered the room and approached the glass. He sighed and looked to the nearest camera.

"Where is the girl?"

"She's in there."

"No she isn't. You gave me the wrong directions on purpose, didn't you?"

_Damn._ "Fine. I did." She sighed, "She's in test chamber one."

"Thank you." he said, narrowing his eyes, almost threateningly. She rolled her eyes, even though he couldn't see her.

"Just go. The sooner, the better." she snapped. He sighed in response and dusted off his pants for no reason. She rested her chin in her hand, sliding open the door.

The girl whipped around and ran to hide behind the stack of cubes. He shook his head and mumbled something GLaDOS couldn't make out.

"Hello!" he waved and the little girl peaked out from behind the stack. GLaDOS wondered from where he conjured the false enthusiasm. He laughed nervously, smiled so widely that it looked unnatural -which was pretty fitting- and squatted so he was more or less on the girl's level. She looked distressed. GLaDOS couldn't blame her. If Wheatley was smiling that widely at her, she'd probably kill him. But she'd be extremely creeped out.

"Who are you?" the little girl asked quietly.

"Uh, can you repeat that? Sorry, couldn't hear."

"Wh-who are you?" she repeated, louder.

"My name's Wheatley." he paused to reword what he wanted to say next, "I'm going to be taking care of you. I really hope that didn't sound too creepy." The girl didn't respond, so he cleared his throat and asked, "What's your name?"

The girl peaks her entire head out from behind the stack of cubes. "Emma." She murmurs the word so the only audible thing is "Em".

"What was that?"

This gave GLaDOS another idea. According to her data, when people name things themselves, they grow more attached to them. Before she could repeat her name louder, GLaDOS interjected, "Oh! I forgot to say. The poor thing forgot her name."

"And how exactly did she do that?" Wheatley asked, staring at the camera. The girl looked up, too.

"I put her in stasis for about an hour and realized that it wasn't safe." she lied, "I guess she remembers that it begins with 'm'"

"Well, what now?"

"You name her." she smirked, happy he couldn't see her.

"Me? Um, alright. Starting with 'm'... Mary, Meredith, Michelle, Megan, Melanie, Magdalena, Misty, Martha, Millie-"

"Just pick one!" she yelled.

"Er... Don't you think she should have a say in what she's called?"

GLaDOS sighed, "Fine. Kid," the girl backed up, "Calm down, I'm not going to kill you. Or hurt you for that matter. It wouldn't be fair. What do you want your name to be?"

The little girl shook her head and made a sound that signaled she was about to cry.

"Perfect, just perfect. Now you've done it." he grumbled. "Hey, now, there's no need to cry. She's not going to hurt you, alright?" He decided to try to move a cube out of the way to see her, but he pulled out the wrong one and the entire thing collapsed on him.

GLaDOS laughed so hard, the android equivalent of tears ran down her face. The girl laughed, too. "Oh, well that's just wonderful! She laughs along with you."

"How can you not laugh at that?" GLaDOS responded.

"Maybe you could have a shred of consideration for others. Just maybe."

"You're in no position to snap at me, moron." GLaDOS was surprised that he was being so bold. _Was that the right word?_ The girl giggled and clapped her hands. "Pick a name, already."

"Well... She doesn't look like she'd be named anything I mentioned before... I don't know. Do you have any ideas?"

She did, actually, but she didn't want to be dragged into this. No. There was a very slim chance she would get attached to the girl, though. _What's the harm?_ She thought. "How about Minerva?"

"That's very exotic. What's it mean?"

"Roman goddess of knowledge. Counterpart of Athena."

Wheatley sat up and squinted, "She doesn't look like she'd be named something so...elaborate... Ooh! I know! Minnie! That's perfect! What do you think?"

The girl backed up again, "Minnie. That's my name?" She looked up at the camera expectantly.

GLaDOS sighed._ I'm getting dragged into this_, she thought. "Yeah, sure. Minnie."

Minnie looked down for a minute, processing her name change. "Er, so..." Wheatley stammered, trying to restart the conversation, "How do you do?" His hand stretched out towards her. She just stared at it. "Oh, well, you see, this is what people do when they meet each other. They shake hands. Like this!" He grabbed his other hand in a manner that was supposed to look like a handshake, but, in typical Wheatley fashion, failed. Minnie mimicked this. "No no no! You do it to another person." Her mouth formed an o shape and she took his again outstretched hand, shaking it somewhat violently. By the expression on his face, GLaDOS guessed that he was afraid his arm would come off.

"Uh, good. Maybe a tad less violent, but you got the basic idea. Then you'd say 'How do you do?', but you don't have to do that."

Minnie walked over and outstretched her hand to the camera. GLaDOS couldn't help but laugh.

"Oh, she isn't here, poppet. She's just watching, and probably planning our deaths." he mumbled the last part.

"Poppet? Who's poppet?" the girl asked.

"No one's poppet. It's just an expression people use instead of other people's names. Like 'mister', 'miss', 'madame'."

"Oh... You talk funny."

GLaDOS laughed even louder. This was worth it already. Just the look of exasperation on the moron's face was enough to justify tearing the young girl from her mother.

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><p>Author's Note: I fail at updating lol. I hope you enjoyed this. Sorry, you guys.<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

**Child's Play**

**Chapter Five**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Portal or anything related.**

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><p>In Wheatley's mind, all androids should be completely devoid of any emotions. That way, he would not have felt the regret, shame, and self-loathing he had felt while in space. He might have actually been able to kill Chell then. Maybe. No. GLaDOS came close once or twice, but she was GLaDOS. Infinitely cunning, infinitely powerful, infinitely cruel GLaDOS. And what was he exactly? Wheatley didn't like to answer this question, as it forced him to come to terms with the one thing he dreaded about himself the most.<p>

And there were a lot of things he dreaded about himself. His height, lack of posture, horrid eyesight, grayish skin that always made him look like a corpse. Was he a corpse? Another question he didn't like to answer. But if he were to try to answer it, the words would fall out in stutters. Voice shaking. Unconfident. Cowardly.

_Him._

_Stop criticizing yourself,_ he thought. All of it had been brought on by the simple realization that he was tired. Shaking his head, he brought his knees into his chest and hugged them. He stole a glance at Minnie, laying there in a pile of fabric Wheatley had scavenged, clutching a teddy bear in one arm and sucking the thumb on the other hand. The Teddy bear. Oh God, the Teddy bear. Wheatley somehow guessed that it was a leftover from Take Your Daughter to Work Day. It was the only explanation he could find. But then, it would have decomposed, right? He pushed logic aside, just glad that there wasn't a trace of neurotoxin on the thing.

She stared at him with big, brown, eyes. "Well, what are you waiting for? Go to sleep." he said.

"I'm hungry, Mr. Wheatley." she grumbled.

"Listen, she's going to help me find food for you tomorrow, so just hang tight, alright, poppet?" he responded.

"The Sky Lady?" the girl asked. She was fascinated with GLaDOS, who she had never actually seen. She was just a disembodied voice that told Wheatley what to do to Minnie. She wasn't any of the things she was to him.

"Yes. The Sky Lady."

"Do you know her, Mr. Wheatley?" Minnie asked.

"Uhh... Sort of." he scratched his head.

"Is she nice?"

Wheatley could have very easily listed the things that GLaDOS had done to make her the meanest person/android/thing that ever lived, but he didn't want to scare the girl, so he just answered, "Yes. But she's very reserved."

"What does that mean?" up now, talking animatedly.

"It means that she doesn't like to talk to people very much."

"But she talks to you a lot. She sounds really smart. Is she? And is she pretty?" she was sitting

"She is very smart. The smartest person I've ever met." That much he didn't have to lie about. The next question to answer would be harder. _Was GLaDOS pretty?_ He had honestly never thought about her, or anyone else, in regards to looks. He just knew what people/androids/things looked like, and never really judged it. "Uhh... Yeah. She's pretty, I guess." There. It wasn't exactly a lie. He really did guess she was pretty. It would make sense for the being in charge of Aperture to look nice, just in case she would be found by someone. And it would be fitting as she is probably the most dangerous thing in the entire facility. It would fit if she was deceptively beautiful.

"Does she have a name?" she asked.

"Yes. Her name is GLaDOS." This was easy to answer for once.

"That's a weird name. Is her hair pretty?" Minnie's face showed more enthusiasm than Wheatley knew it was possible to show.

"Um." All he could remember about her hair was that it was long and it was light gray. "Yeah, it's nice. Listen, you really need to go to bed, so no talking, okay?"

"But-"

"No buts."

"Can't you tell me a story? Please? I'll be real quiet, I promise!" she clutched at the largest piece of fabric she was able to find.

He sighed in resignation, "Alright. One story. That's it and then you sleep, okay?"

"Yes, sir, Mr. Wheatley!"

He chuckled, "Okay." he thought for a minute about what story to tell. The only ones he knew were Cinderella and Little Red Riding Hood. As for the latter, a story of a girl being eaten by a wolf didn't seem like a good bedtime story. And Cinderella bored Wheatley to tears. So, in his mind, he concocted a beginning to a story. "Okay, so once there was this-"

"No!"

"What?"

"That's not how you start a story, Mr. Wheatley." she laughed at him.

"Well then, poppet, how do you start a story?"

"Once upon a time..."

"Oh! Right! I knew that!" Minnie giggled. He hushed her, "Remember, you're sleeping after this. Okay, so, once upon a time, there was a beautiful enchantress that blessed the nearby kingdom with wealth and sunshine all year long. The kingdom loved her for this and they celebrated her."

"Was she pretty, Mr. Wheatley?" she whispered.

"Yes. I said she was beautiful."

"Like the Sky Lady? Er, GLaDOS?"

"Yes." And Wheatley did suppose that the enchantress in his story would make a good GLaDOS. He could run with this, "Okay, so, one of her spells went wrong, and it turned her into a horrible witch." Minnie gasped, "And she hid away in a cave, attached to the roof by the very power of her dark magic. People traveling to the kingdom were lured into her cave, most were not ever seen again. So the king of the kingdom asked for the help of their best knights. So they went to the cave to fight the witch. None came back.

"The king became distressed, as each member of his army fell, one by one. When they had all died, he was about to go in himself. But, when he announced this, a counselor reminded the king of the warrior princess."

"What was her name?" Minnie asked, "And the witch, too?"

"Uhhhh... You decide. Anyways, the warrior princess agreed to her quest and traveled to the witch's cave. The princess had grown up with tales of the enchantress, and she was shocked when the horrible witch that had killed so many of her comrades was the woman whose praises were sung when she was a child. Nonetheless, the warrior princess did battle with the witch. Her cunning made her a match for the witch's magic. The witch, knowing that she couldn't win now, cast one last spell. The spell froze both the witch and the princess in a deep sleep.

"The cave was also sealed off by the spell's intensity. When the king went himself to find the warrior princess, because all his other men were either dead or injured, he saw this. Since the witch had not removed the barrier, he had guessed that both parties had offed each other. So-"

"What does that mean? 'Offed'?" Minnie asked.

"I don't know how to explain it to you. Wait until your older." Wheatley said, shrugging. His mind lingered on it for a minute. How was he to explain to this girl that he could not die? Remembering GLaDOS's threat, he reminded himself that he was capable of dying. It was just a bit harder. The girl looked crestfallen, "Anyways, the king delivered the news that the witch was gone, but the warrior princess lost her life in the process. They celebrated her as a war hero. The End."

There was silence for a little, until Minnie piped up with, "But she's really just sleeping, right, Mr. Wheatley?"

"Yes, that's right. And you should be, too." he responded indignantly.

"Will the prince come to save her?"

"Prince?"

"Yeah! All good stories have a prince. Didn't you know that?"

"Umm. There are no princes in this story." he paused, thinking about this. "But there is a wizard."

"A wizard prince?"

"No. Just a regular wizard."

"Will he save the princess?"

"That's another story. Tomorrow, okay?"

The girl pouted. "Okay." she said gloomily.

"Now, good night. When you wake up, I won't be here, so just stay in here. You're not to leave this room unless I'm with you, you hear?"

"Yes, Mr. Wheatley. Good night." she yawned, grabbed the Teddy bear, and nearly collapsed.

"Nice story, moron." said GLaDOS over the loud speaker.

"Shhh!" he hushed, "It took me forever to get her to sleep! So kindly shut your trap!" Wheatley flinched, expecting her to scream or set something on fire, but the only sound she made was soft laughter. He also expected her to say something about him calling her pretty, but she was silent after that. Exhaling, he screwed his eyes shut.

…

The night passed in a big, black, blur. A soft rapping at the door finally forced him to open his eyes. As silently as he could, which was hard when you had freakishly large feet as he did (the engineers seemed to do everything to make movement awkward for him), he made his way to the door, which slid open as if it knew he was there to reveal GLaDOS with a scowl on her pale face. He yelped at the sight of her, but slapped his hands over his mouth.

She raised one gray eyebrow, "Surprised?" He nodded in response. She jerked her head away from the chamber, "Come on."

Wheatley looked back at the sleeping girl. She noticed this and scoffed, "She'll be fine. I'm not going to hold it against you if she dies when you're with me."

"What!"

"Not that she could die. I have her locked in there with constant ventilation. Relax, moron." she started walking towards an empty wall.

"Y'know, love," her scowl became more frightening, "I mean m'am! What I'm trying to say is that I did not expect you to actually show up."

"I can't reach the place we're going over the speaker." she explained, sliding her hand across the wall until a panel popped out. She slid over to it and began pressing buttons. She seemed to barely be touching the number pad. The wall slid open, revealing the insides of the facility. "Which reminds me. You're not to go to this place if I'm not with you. Since I can't reach you, you could run if you wanted to, not that you'd get anywhere. The consequence is death. _Understand?"_

"Yes, m'am."

"Good. Now, follow me." she moved at such a fast pace, Wheatley had to almost run to keep up.

Something had him noticing the smallest details about her. Maybe it was the questions Minnie asked last night and not being to answer the one about GLaDOS's looks. He noticed the awkward way in which she walked first, and soon realized that it was to keep her hips from swaying in a way that would bring attention to them. It half worked. Her hips didn't sway as much, but the stiff lock of her knees drew attention to them.

Next, he noticed the slight bounce of her silver bun. He wondered what her hair looked like down because he honestly could not remember a time her hair had been down. Wait, no. There were three times. Once, when she had woken up, but he was too terrified to pay attention to her. Twice, when he assumed control of the facility, but he was too busy being amazed at his new status to care. And third, when he was reviewing the tapes of GLaDOS's murder. At the very last moment, her hair fell out of its arrangement, flying all around her before she died. But he, of course, was too preoccupied with constructing a strategy to fight Chell with, to notice small details.

There was also the rhythmic clacking of her wedge-heeled boots. They had been walking for such a long time he could notice that, too. When she stopped abruptly, right before when he knew her foot would fall again, it disrupted the rhythm he was growing used to. This gave him a split second to wonder if something was wrong before he slammed into her. She stumbled forward two steps before stopping and turning to face him, an ugly scowl placed on her face.

This is when Wheatley found his answer to Minnie's question.

It was, as he had suspected, yes.

Before he could be scared by her again, his brain took a moment to collect proof to support his answer, as part of him would not believe it. Her cheekbones were set high, adding to the angular shape of her face. Her eyes were actually rather large with thick eyelashes. They weren't gold or neon yellow, but some odd yellow Wheatley didn't have a name for. It looked like plain old yellow from a distance, but close up it was a color that seemed lifeless, even with the glow in them. If her face was not twisted in a scowl, she might have been even lovelier. But it would have taken more imagination than Wheatley had to imagine her smiling. Not a smirk. A _smile_. Warm and happy.

Her words snapped him out of it, "Pay attention, moron!"

"I'm sorry, love! I mean m'am!" he instinctively place his arms in front of him, palms spread, ready to push her away just in case she were to run at him, intending to kill.

"Just remember that I can still change my mind about letting you live. And as long as I have this on," she gestured to the headset she wore, "I can kill you in a variety of gruesome ways. Pity I can't use neurotoxin."

"Well, I do breathe. I don't need to, but I do it anyway." he said.

"I do, too. They built us so intricately. You feel like you're forgetting to do something when you don't breathe, right?" she brushed something off of her leg.

"Yes. That's it exactly." he responded, amazed at her understanding.

"I looked at the blueprints. We are built in the exact same way. Funny. I'd expect me to be a bit better than you. After all, I iam/i more important." she had stopped walking. She glared at him challengingly, daring him to make some snide remark.

He didn't, though, because he really didn't want to die today. "Of course you are. You are in charge of the entire facility. That's pretty important."

Her face showed a flash of disappointment. "Anyway, the way our bodies are designed is amazing. iMarvelous/i nervous system. I like that we can feel pain." she stomped on his foot. Hard. He yelped and jumped back, stuttering unintelligibly. "It will make killing you much more enjoyable, don't you think, Wheatley?" GLaDOS spoke in a sweet voice, fluttering her eyelashes.

"I suppose it will." he responded as calmly as possible. It seemed she expected more of a show from him, as she rolled her eyes and stormed to another wall. Soon enough, the wall had opened. She slipped in, and he followed.

Wheatley's eyes widened at the inside. It was like a giant refrigerator. According to his marvelous nervous system, the air temperature had dropped significantly, causing him to cross his arms and hunch his shoulders in an attempt to keep his body heat inside him. The room was full of countless shelves, each one gargantuan, all full of sacks, boxes, crates, and cans, all of food. More food than Wheatley knew was on Earth. "Where'd we get all this food?"

"Sustenance for test subjects past." she explained, thrusting a sack of potatoes into his arms with an extremely nasty glare, "They stockpiled them before I decided to use artificial stuff that doesn't need to be refrigerated. Although, I never knew if I was going to need this, so I kept it on. Useful now." she disappeared, returning a minute later carrying more food. "This will run out in my lifetime."

"Which is forever."

"Exactly." Was his mind playing tricks on him, or did Wheatley actually see her smile ruefully for a second? "But it will not run out in hers. If all goes well, you'll outlive it. It's not likely, though."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. How is this stuff not rotted yet?"

She squinted, looking up. "The refrigeration system is unlike anything you could imagine. I can't even explain it, and I'm, well, me. I mean, we can preserve humans so they're more or less functioning for God knows how long, so maybe they could do the same with food."

There were ladders going up the entire height of the shelves. Each shelf seemed to have a little bit of room for someone to walk along and grab things to take back down. This seemed to be where the most perishable and the rarest items were stored. Mostly meat. The shelves were just tall enough for someone of Wheatley's height, which meant GLaDOS had a lot of room above her.

She climbed up one of them, looking down at him when she was halfway up it. "I'm going to get some stuff from up here and throw it down." she yelled, "I'd be much obliged if you could catch it."

"I'll try." he yelled back. She climbed the remainder of the ladder and disappeared for a few minutes. He stood waiting for her projectiles, but they didn't come. She came out a minute later and climbed down a few rungs to the next shelf and disappeared again.

"Incoming!"

Three small boxes dropped from above. Wheatley caught the one, but did not pay much attention to the other two. One fell in front of him, and the other hit his head. The box was hard from being frozen for so long, and the artificial nerves in his head sent pain signals to his brain. The sudden influx of signals disoriented him, and he stumbled into another shelf, knocking a container of oats into his lap.

"Sorry!" she yelled, "I should've thrown them down one at a time."

Was he still dizzy or did she just apologize? He sat almost frozen at the shelf debating this and rubbing his head. He looked up and saw the glow of her yellow eyes peaking off the side of the shelf. They disappeared and a few minutes later she came down the ladder, her arms laden with other containers.

"You okay?" she asked, depositing the containers on a pile of food she was building.

Confused, he answered, "Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks for asking."

Something that looked like annoyance crossed her face, only visible to him by her profile. This was too weird. A short time ago, she was stepping on his feet and threatening him. Now she was asking him if he was okay? _What?_

He was so perplexed that he didn't notice her plucking the can of oats that had fallen on him from his hands.

"Geez, are you sure you're okay? You're acting brain-damaged." she asked, staring at him skeptically.

"Uh, I'm fine. Just a bit confused." Wheatley responded, rubbing his head. He tried not to flinch as the pain rekindled.

She tsked, "This should hold the child for a week or two. After all it's only a child."

"H-how are we going to carry all this?" he asked.

Ignoring him, she mumbled something into her headset. Wheatley stood up and brushed off his pants.

A few minutes later, there was a meek voice at the door. _Turrets._ He tensed, afraid that she was just going to shoot him now. Could he die from gunshots? He didn't know.

GLaDOS snapped her pale fingers and the door slid open again, revealing three little white-haired girls with huge machine guns strapped to their backs.

"You...made android turrets?"

She shrugged, "I was bored. You get bored with no organic test subjects to kill. Does that answer your question?"

"Yes. Thank you."

The turret girls each took a pile of food in their arms. The size of each pile was laughable compared to their own sizes. GLaDOS barked out the location of the girl and they departed.

Wheatley worried that Minnie would get excited that there were other seemingly human girls and ask more questions that he couldn't answer or go after them.

Was that what he was worrying about? They had guns! What happened to a human when they got shot with a gun? They died. And what would happen when Minnie died? He would die.

As if she could sense his distress, she said, "Don't worry. They don't have ammo on them. They can't shoot. At worst, they'll just stand there and point their guns at the girl and she'll be mentally scarred. Don't worry. Take part of the remainder and follow me."

...

The trek back to Wing G Chamber 0 was uneventful. Being a gentleman, Wheatley took the majority of what was left of the food pile, which wasn't much to begin with. GLaDOS was carrying so little that she was able to punch in the access code without readjusting what she was carrying.

The wall opened and GLaDOS seemed to storm in. What was she angry about now? The door to the chamber slid open as soon as she approached it.

Good God, she was powerful. Not only that, she knew exactly how to handle power, to handle others, and first and foremost, how to handle herself. For reasons he didn't fully understand, Wheatley felt a rush of respect for the smaller android.

Shaking his head, he followed her into the room.

Minnie was hiding under the fabric scraps until she saw him. When she did see him, she yelled, "Mr. Wheatley!" so suddenly, he jumped.

"H-hello, poppet!" the door to the second part of the first chamber had opened, and she had disappeared inside, "Hang on, I'll be right back. Don't leave this chamber."

"Okay..." the girl sounded scared.

He followed GLaDOS into the room. She was kneeling in the corner, forming a pile of food. Well, it was more like organizing. She stood up and took the food from his arms to place it on the pile.

"Um, I was wondering how I was going to cook this stuff?" he asked.

She was silent. Somehow, Wheatley could sense that she was distressed. She shook her head, "Give me a minute."

He nodded, "Something wrong, love?"

"No. Don't call me that."

"I'll be back." he said. The door slid back open. "Hello, pop-" the little girl attached herself to Wheatley's legs, crying her eyes out. "Oh! What's wrong, poppet?"

She looked up with red eyes and sniffed, "They had boom sticks, Mr. Wheatley."

"Boom sticks?" he asked, but he didn't really need to ask. _Guns._ GLaDOS was right. The girl nodded, sniffing pitifully. He knelt to her level and Minnie threw her arms around his neck and kept bawling. "There, there." he patted her back tentatively. He looked behind her at the door. It was open a crack, a flash of yellow showing through. "Don't worry, poppet, those girls won't hurt you. And when I'm not there, the Sky Lady is watching you." he couldn't say GLaDOS's name when she was watching.

"Is she?" Minnie sniffed hopefully.

"Yeah..." _I hope she doesn't kill me for this._ "In fact, she's right in there. Would you like to meet her?"

The little girl's eyes widened and face turned from a scared frown to an excited smile, "Really?"

"Uh-huh." Wheatley laughed nervously. Right on cue, GLaDOS appeared from the other room.

"Hello..." she said.

"Y-you're GLaDOS...the Sky Lady?" Minnie asked, suddenly becoming shy again.

"Yes, that's me." she smiled almost warmly. Then she mumbled, "I presume."

"You're really pretty!" the child's face erupted in a large smile.

GLaDOS's face turned red, "Th-thank you."

Wheatley took this opportunity to slip into the other testing room. There was a frozen meal already cooked.

His first thought was why did she do it. It made no sense to him, because he thought she'd make him figure it out. He grimaced and turned away.

There was a laser hitting a node with a cube under it, the heat just touching the top of the thing. Clever.

"Well, duh." he whispered, "That's why she was made."

Also, there was a single potato sitting near the cube with a knife wedged in it. What it was doing there, Wheatley had no idea, but he had another idea.

He picked the plant up and sat back down, knife in hand. He started to carve the word, _"Sorry."_ The letters were big and awkward, but readable. He knew how to write, but never really had much practice.

He sighed and picked up the food, shoving the potato in his overcoat's pocket. The door slid open to reveal Minnie sitting in the same position, talking animatedly. GLaDOS was kneeling in front of her, smiling and nodding, listening to something she was saying.

"Look, food." she said, pointing to him. He handed the tray to the little girl. She began to shovel food into her mouth with her hands. GLaDOS grimaced and shoved a spoon into her small hand, "Use this."

"Sorry."

"Don't speak with your mouth full." GLaDOS scolded. Wheatley looked at her questioningly. Why was she helping?

"So..." Wheatley began.

"Outside. _Now."_ she whispered, then rose her voice, "It was nice meeting you, Minnie. I'll see you around."

She stood up, adjusted her skirt, and left the room through the door in the front.

"I'll be right back, poppet. Keep eating, okay?"

The little girl nodded, and Wheatley followed GLaDOS out into the room with the glass box, "Yes?"

"I...I want to help you..." she stated, not turning around.

"What?"

"It was stupid to think that you could do this all on your own. I mean, you're you. So, I'll help out for a little. Just until you can get along by yourself." she turned just so one glowing yellow eye was visible.

"R-really?"

"Yes, really."

"Thank you."

"You're not welcome." she sighed loudly, "I don't like this, but it's whatever."

"You don't have to do this. I mean, it's my punishment, love." he said.

"Don't call me that!" she yelled, "And do you want my help or not!"

"Sorry! A-and it's not like I don't want your help, it's j-just that I d-don't understand why you're offering it to me..."

GLaDOS turned to face him, "I'm not exactly sure, either."

They stood there in silence for a minute, searching each other's faces for an answer to questions that weren't even asked.

"Well...I should go..." she said, looking away, her cheeks pink. She began to walk away.

"No! Wait!" he yelled. She turned around again, and he couldn't meet her gaze. "I-I have s-something for you..."

He pulled the potato out of his pocket and placed it in her snow white hand. She looked from the object in her hand to his face and back to the potato.

"Turn it over." he instructed. She did, uncovering the word, "Sorry."

She looked back at him and he smiled ruefully. GLaDOS turned around and left the room, heels clicking in a way that sounded furious.

Wheatley sighed, turned around, and reentered the room, this time not wishing that he had no emotions, but wishing that he was able to identify his own.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: I'm not gonna even say that this is overdue because everyone already knows it. I hope you enjoyed. This was fun to write. And rewrite. And write again.<strong>


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